Why I Can't Go To The Gym Today

by DavalosMcCormack on November 2, 2009

We’ve all done it. You have your workout clothes all ready, you have finished work for the day and you are supposed to be heading to the gym. But somehow the idea of jumping on the treadmill, taking an aerobics class, or lifting those weights is not nearly as appealing as going home, flopping on the couch, opening a beer or getting some ice cream, and just vegetating in front of the TV.

Don’t worry. You are not a bad person. You are just human. We can all find reasons why we don’t want to go. The most common excuse is lack of time. Another popular one is that you are too out of shape. Really, that’s true. A study by the American Council on Exercise found 19 percent of people said they were too out of shape to work out. But isn’t that precisely why you should go, so you are not out of shape!

Whatever the reason, if you have run out of good excuses, here are some others you can try when people say “I thought you were going to work out today!”.

I don’t work out because all the exercise programs say that when you start you should wear “loose-fitting clothes” and I don’t have any loose-fitting clothes!

I’ve already had a complete workout at the office because I spent the day jumping to conclusions, pulling out all the stops, bending over backwards, passing the buck, pushing my luck, dragging my heels and climbing the walls. That’s enough exercise for one day.

I checked with my doctor and he told me my heart couldn’t stand the shock of seeing how much exercise equipment or gym membership cost.

My allergies are bothering me. I’m allergic to exercise.

I read a study that said we are all born with a pre-determined number of breaths. Once we use those up we die. So I can’t exercise because it will only make me breathe faster and shorten my life.

Or the flipside of that one. It’s a proven scientific fact that for every mile you run you add one minute to your life. This means that if you keep exercising until you are 85 years old you will get to spend an extra 5 months in a nursing home at $4,500 a month. I can’t afford that.

I’m already in shape. I think round is a great shape.

Exercising is dangerous. My grandmother started a new exercise program where she walks five miles a day. That was two weeks ago. Now we have no idea where the heck she is so I have to go look for her.

I prefer to exercise early in the morning before my brain and my body figure out what’s going on.

I think if God meant me to touch my toes he would have put them further up my body.

I started exercising because I wanted to take up cross-country skiing. Then I realize the US is way too big, there’s no way I’ll ever ski across it, so I stopped.

Last time I exercised it made me spill the ice cubes right out of my glass.

So there are plenty of excuses why you can’t or won’t exercise. But there is only one good reason. Because it’s good for you. Ultimately you have to decide which is the most important.

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